Black Maternal Health Week: Why Black Mothers Deserve More Than Survival

For Black Maternal Health Week, this deeply personal essay explores birth trauma, postpartum recovery, and why Black mothers deserve more than survival. A founder reflection on healing, care, and what support should truly look like.

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There are some things the body remembers long after everyone else has moved on.

For me, birth was one of them.

When I gave birth to my first son, it was not the beautiful, supported, sacred experience I had hoped for.

It was traumatic.

What should have been one of the most life-changing and tender moments of my life became an experience marked by fear, pain, medical chaos, and survival.

I had an emergency c-section. The epidural would not take. I was sedated multiple times.

Eventually, my body had to be numbed from the neck down. I was vomiting. I was shaking uncontrollably. My body went into shock. And while all of this was happening, I could hear the surgeons and staff casually discussing the Las Vegas mass shooting as if my body was not open on a table in front of them. As if I was not there. As if I was not a person in one of the most vulnerable moments of my life.

Then, immediately after surgery, I underwent a myomectomy. My son was sent to the NICU.

And while he was there, I was heavily drugged and trying to recover from an infected uterus, trapped in a body that had already endured too much. I stayed in the hospital for a week.

And when I finally left, the hardest part was still ahead of me.

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Survival Is Not the Same as Care

The thing about traumatic birth is that people often treat the outcome as the whole story.

If the baby is here and the mother is alive, the assumption is often that things turned out fine. But survival is not the same as being cared for. And discharge is not the same as healing. There is a difference between making it through and being truly held through what happened. Too often, Black mothers are expected to endure the unimaginable and still be grateful.

Still be strong.

Still be functional.

Still be okay.

But what many Black mothers actually need is not praise for surviving.

We need care.

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Trauma Does Not End When the Birth Ends

Birth trauma does not only live in memory.

It can stay in the body long after the hospital stay is over.

It can show up as:

• hypervigilance

• anxiety around medical settings

• fear when the body feels vulnerable

• emotional numbness

• flashbacks or intrusive thoughts

• difficulty resting or feeling safe

• grief over the birth experience you did not get to have

And for many mothers, all of this unfolds while they are also expected to immediately care for a newborn, heal physically, and somehow step into motherhood as if their own body did not just endure something life-altering.

That is not a small thing.

That is not something to simply move on from.

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The Care Black Mothers Deserve

Black Maternal Health Week exists because the disparities are real.

Black mothers are more likely to experience medical neglect, dismissal, delayed treatment, and preventable complications in maternal care.

But beyond the statistics, there is a deeper truth that often goes unspoken: Black mothers deserve to be deeply cared for.

Not only when something goes wrong. Not only during labor. Not only when people are watching.

We deserve care before birth. Care during birth. Care after birth. Care for the body. Care for the nervous system. Care for the emotional aftermath.

We deserve tenderness that does not have to be earned through suffering.

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Healing Deserves Time, Gentleness & Truth

Healing after trauma is rarely linear.

It can take years for the body to feel safe again.

It can take time to even find language for what happened.

And sometimes healing begins simply by telling the truth.

By naming what happened without minimizing it.

By allowing ourselves to admit that something was not okay.

By refusing to call survival the standard.

Because Black mothers deserve more than survival.

We deserve care that sees us as fully human while we are living through it — not only after the fact.

And we deserve systems, spaces, and communities that honor that truth.

Resources for Support

We do not have to navigate these realities alone.

• Black Mamas Matter Alliance — advocacy, research, and policy work centered on Black maternal health.

• Postpartum Support International — education, support groups, and mental health resources for postpartum healing.

• Local maternal health advocates, doulas, and community organizations — on-the-ground care, guidance, and culturally aware support for mothers and families.

If you or someone you love needs support, reaching for care is a sign of strength.

Always wishing you More™.